Pastrami

My dearest red meat,
that I had planned to eat,
Has somehow grown feet,
And has gone.

Scanless, truly it is.
How I tasted it in my sleep.
Yet some wretched mongrel came
and ruined my sandwich dream.

Oh you evil oppressors,
why did you eat my snack so fast,
the one that promised to increase my weight
and add more jiggle to my ass.

How I despise,
the cruel taunting lies,
no one will fess up,
because my wrath I cannot hide.

So it is with sadness I write,
with pain I recite,
this love poem to my pastrami,
that some sucka ate last night.

I loved you, my dear sandwich.